On the Job by Anita Bruzzese The Science Behind Getting What You Want at Work

On the Job by Anita Bruzzese The Science Behind Getting What You Want at Work When you were a kid, your mom probably asked you to say the magic word when requesting something. You quickly found out that saying please could get you what you wanted. But Tim Davis, a professional magician and communications expert, says there are actually seven magic words backed up by science that can help you persuade, influence and engage others. By knowing the right thing to say, youll be able to get your team to perform better and get others to make concessions when negotiating. He says its a technique he has taught to companies such as 3M and Burger King. Davis outlines the seven magic words in his book, Magic Words: Yes.He says its important to remember when youre negotiating, arguing or making a sales pitch, its important you get to yes as soon as possible. Saying yes at the beginning of an interaction eases tension, creates rapport and opens minds, he says. He explains that in every interaction, you are being judged in two phases. The first phase is highly emotional, illogical and often unfair. This is the phase that puts you into one of four buckets: good, bad, sexy, or boring. Boring is usually the default setting, because we cant possibly be interested in everybody, so the brain quickly categorizes people into the buckets. Thats why good and sexy move into phase two, while bad and boring get left behind, he explains. Further, a yes gives you your best chance of getting placed into the good bucket, he says. Since the first phase takes only seconds to complete, the kind of yes youll have to use is largely non-verbal. A smile, mirroring body language and tonality, etc., he explains. By finding something to agree upon with the other person, you can stop arguments from getting out of control. For example, offering a youre right can ease tensions and help keep the conversation going, he says. 2.But.Allen suggests using the word and instead of but. Thats because once you add but to a comment, it can erase your yes. Another strategy is to place the information you want someone to remember the most after you say but. He explains that while the word and links two ideas together, saying but draws a distinct line between them. What comes before a but is ignored and what comes after a but is enhanced. Its the word that I see misusedmostoften, he says. 3. Because.Toddlers often ask why so much that their parents may simply respond because just to stop the constant questioning. But this points to the brains need for a link between cause and effect. David explains that compelling reasons that may satisfy someone include want to, choose to, love to, and called to. This can be especially helpful to salespeople, David says, because people dont buy what you do, they buy why you do it. 4. A name.Simply saying someones name can be valuable in engaging the other person, and can be especially valuable when dealing withintroverts. Calling someone by name and inviting feedback can make them feel their input at work is important, and (read more here)